Friday 18 June 2021

Losing A Loved One

It was so good to share Brooke's story a couple of days ago. Our little village mentioned in the local media in a positive way. But within hours another story was bringing Swanton Morley into the headlines again, this time in a sad way. 

Bob was standing at the kitchen sink when he saw police cars in the close, and coppers going door-to-door. Two were approaching Cornerstones . It appeared that an 87 year old lady, suffering from dementia, had gone missing from the Care Home [very close to us, just by the medical centre] The officers asked if they could search our little back garden. Of course... [I have no idea what they thought of the five bicycles, summerhouse stacked with boxes, and other stuff temporarily leaning against the wall under a large tarp] Other police were searching adjacent gardens. 

"Lowland Search and Rescue" sent in a team, and other folk from the village joined them. Grateful thanks to all who helped. Sadly the lady was found, on ground beside a lane just outside the village. It was 48 hours after her disappearance, and she had died. A sad story indeed

I said to Bob "if I ever get dementia, fit me with GPS tracker!". I didn't realise that these are already 'a thing'. This company markets them. [other models available] There are 850k people in Britain who are living with dementia, and 6 out of 10 will develop "wandering" behaviour. Obviously prevention is safer than a search - but needs to be balanced with personal freedom, and still enjoying life.  This sort of device brings so much peace of mind to family and carers. A tracker cannot guarantee absolute safety but would be a help. 

The GPS trackers company mentioned above has really practical advice, both about reducing risk, and organising an effective search, do have a look. I am so sad for Margaret's family and friends. 

Years ago [pre mobile phones] I was driving home to Kirby Muxloe late at night, and passed an old lady on the quiet road out of the village, apparently wearing just a nightie. I stopped and asked if she was OK. She said, distractedly that she was going to her sister's house. As I was less than a mile from home, I fetched Bob. He took me back to her and then alerted the police. I remember she was scared but let me walk with her. It would have been wrong to force her into a car. Her conversation was "away with the fairies" as they say. All was well in the end, the police established who she was [she lived independently in a warden-assisted scheme close by] But if I'd not driven past, who knows where she'd have ended up? 

Lockdown has taken its toll on the mental health of our nation - especially the frail, elderly folk who cannot access the benefits of contact-through-technology. 

The answer to the ancient question "Am I my brother's keeper?" remains a resounding YES , especially when our brothers and sisters are unable to fully care for themselves. 

Praying this week for Margaret's family, the Care Home staff and all affected by this tragedy. 





8 comments:

  1. Oh that is very sad indeed! Dementia is such a cruel disease. My grandma (Dad's dad) had Alzheimer's from when we were quite young and it was horrible for my Grandpa and Dad. The GPS trackers are a super idea!

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  2. A sad story and even more sadly not an unusual one, Many years ago there was a similar tragedy near the smallholding when a man went missing from the care home in the village - he too had died but many miles away on the big stretches of heathland and wasn't found for weeks.
    I think more research is now being done for causes of Dementia like happened for cancer research, hope it's successful

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    1. I suppose in rural areas, it is easier for people to wander away into fields and heathland where there are fewer folk about who can get them to safety. As a higher proportion of the population is ageing now, I imagine there will be pressure for more research into such diseases. I have such respect for those who love and care for these people.

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  3. Poor lady, and poor family too. So sad.

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  4. So sad. I live next to a residential home.

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  5. Very sad and a great sorrow for the family. Years ago an elderly friend wandered away from his house in the night and was found in a snowbank. Fortunately he was not in too bad shape and recovered in hospital. GPS trackers are a great idea.

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  6. So very sad. We often have "silver alert" texts pop up on our phones asking people to be on the look out for seniors with dementia that have wandered off.

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  7. That's a very sad story. The GPS trackers are a good idea.

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