Just Ten Weeks...

I do not bother to get so organised about Christmas these days. Fifteen years ago, our family Christmas and the church calendar was utterly manic. I made Bob a special tee shirt listing all the events.

Retirement has many blessings - and one of them is having time just to enjoy the season.

I don't really need to add to my seasonal decorations - and certainly I decluttered lots of stuff in the Autumn before retirement. We have no need of a staircase garland when you live in a bungalow, or the shelf with stocking hooks when there is no mantelpiece.

But I did succumb this week, and spent £2.50 on Charity shop bargains.

The needle-felted dog on his sled, and that red love-joy-peace mug really needed to come home with me!

I did not succumb to the Musketeer Bear. There were at least 60 bears from this collection in a bin in the CS**, at £1 each. At their original prices, that would have cost someone over £300. Cute though they were, I did not fall for the charms of Caesar the Roman bear,nor Vik the Viking, nor Giorgio the Gondolier. But a serious arctophile like Gyles Brandreth would find lots of bargains here [**the new PACT charity shop in Dereham] 

Have you started 'Christmas Planning' yet?

Everything Everywhere All At Once

No I have not seen the film with this odd title, described as a phenomenally deranged sci-fi epic that catapults a heartwarming family story to cult status thanks to its cutting edge visual imagery and unexpected narrative quirks. But the phrase does describe the domestic chaos which seems to be besetting me at the minute...

First, my beloved Sebo vacuum cleaner, aged 27, stopped working in February. Fortunately there was a Panasonic cleaner here before we retired, and I had kept that. I dug it out and have been using that. It does the job, but not as efficiently. The Sebo had already been repaired once. Bob fixed it, but the motor smells, and it is no longer up to the job. I will learn to love the Panasonic.

Next, I switched on my Rowenta steam iron, last week, and all the lights went out and the TV went off! I let it cool down, tried again later, and the same thing happened. I had a smaller pre-retirement Bosch iron here. That came out and has been 'pressed into service' Yesterday Bob found the right hex keys for unscrewing the Rowenta. Verdict: that too is unfixable.  Rowenta have some sort of policy that you can buy spare parts for up to 15 years. I have had my iron just over 16 years! [So I cannot complain, it has given me good service] I have fewer items to iron now we are retired anyway.

Finally my Vax Steam Cleaner bit the dust yesterday. All that rain meant a fair bit of mud had come in, despite our best efforts at wiping feet. I decided to steam clean all the hard floors [that's everywhere except the study and the spare bedroom] But the design is faulty, in that however careful you are, this thing has a tendency to fall over if left unattended. And when the plastic handle hits the ground, it smashes. We realised we were onto our fourth layer of gaffer tape, and the thing could only be operated with both arms wrapped round the handle, top [switch] and bottom [steering] and cleaning the floor was altogether very complicated. I had the steam cleaner before I got the Rowenta - so again, a rather old piece of kit, and the plastic was very brittle.

I looked at the possibility of replacing it. But I don't want to shell out £80. Liz and Steph suggested I was overthinking, and I ought to use a regular mop and bucket. So I shall use the Vileda Mop that [you've guessed it] I used at Cornerstones pre-retirement. 

I am very fortunate to have replacements for each of these three items to hand, even if they aren't quite as good as the originals. 

But it really does feel as if everything, everywhere, all at once, is falling to bits. 

Cutting The Ties

One significant change in retirement is Bob is rarely in formal dress these days- fewer occasions requiring a suit with collar and tie. This has reduced my ironing load [whoopee!] and the few ties he has kept stay unworn in the wardrobe most of the time. He has one shirt which he loves, a blue, cotton twill "Oxford". It is loose, and comfortable. But it is rather old, and the collar has worn right through.

I unpicked the collar and lifted it right out of the collar band. Then restitched the gap along the top of the band by hand. 

Voila! a casual collarless shirt. Perfect for balmy summer days. No tie required

Creating Calm From Chaos

Liz recommended this book, and so I borrowed it from the library.* It calls itself a "get-real guide" - and I have to agree with Liz, this woman does write with a down-to-earth, honest attitude to clutter with which many of us can identify.

*don't buy the book. It is £13 and is unlikely to earn a permanent place on the shelf. If you cannot borrow, then get a 2nd hand copy for less than £3 - and pass it on to somebody else. 

Debora [a blogger and foodwriter] has read extensively on the whole subject of decluttering, and selects the best advice from a wide range of writers. She acknowledges that Marie Kondo has helped bazillions of people to organise their homes- but says the "Does it Spark Joy?" question does not really work for her. However she likes MKs systematic approach to sorting out belongings.

She acknowledges that many people feel 'marooned in a sea of possessions, and not knowing where to start, feeling overwhelmed and flustered'

She counsels against emptying your entire wardrobe on the bed to sort it- you may never dig yourself out! Or you will run out of time part way through. It's late, you want to go to bed, so the unsorted stuff will be stuffed back into cupboards and drawers, and remain in a tangled mess for months until you have spare time. Just do one drawer or shelf at a time...

She urges us to see that we do not need all this stuff- 'chuck it overboard and move forward'

Debora cites all sorts of long established 'gurus' - Martha Cilley, the FlyLady who has been sharing wise tips since the 1990s, Norah Ephron the wonderfully witty writer, Margaretta Magnusson [Swedish Death Cleaning] Edward de Bono [who introduced us to lateral thinking] and many others. I have enjoyed the writings of all 4 of these in the past, and DR shares some of their best ideas. Her writing style is clever, and self deprecating, peppered with amusing anecdotes and little cartoons.

But the book is above all practical - simple ways to build decluttering habits into your lifestyle. Which tasks to do if you have 5/10/15/30/60 minutes.

And a gentle reminder that "keep/ donate /sell /discard" must be done thoughtfully.

keep - do I love it, do I use it, do I need it?

donate - will anyone else truly want this. Don't pass on junk to family, or the charity shop - that is adding to their burden

sell - fine, if you are going to get on and do the selling. But don't keep boxes of stuff hanging about waiting for The Right Moment. Schedule a day for listing with Ziffit/ eBay/ Etsy/ FBMarketplace - and if you can't [and the stuff genuinely has value] give it away.

discard - carefully, landfill being your last resort, after diligent sorting and recycling.

The book is full of little nuggets of inspiration - and does not make you feel a failure. Some decluttering books are Very Worthy - this one makes you smile, and feel that even if all you do this week is sort out your spice rack, you are making progress. 

I did a lot of downsizing prior to retirement - but I consider decluttering is an ongoing activity. Reading this book has encouraged me to look again at the process, and tackle some of my heaps, stores, and stashes in a new way. Thank you Liz for the recommendation. 

I rate this book *****

Lent Reflection #3 - Leaving Deliberately

First looking again, then learning graciously, now leaving deliberately 

What do I mean by that? It is all about my mindset around letting go of things. For all of my 66th year, when I wasn't adjusting to the lifestyle changes inflicted by the Pandemic, or running Grandma's Nursery for Rosie, I was working towards retirement and moving.

There was definitely a lot of letting go/leaving behind at that point

• letting go of church responsibilities. 
• letting go of superfluous furniture and 'homewares'. Lots of stuff as we went from 40 years in large Manses [plus holiday bungalow] to just Cornerstones.
• leaving behind many friends - yes some friendships last, but there is a difference between day-to-day contact and distanced relationships. 
• leaving behind resources which we have no storage room for, in our new life - and realistically no use for. My beloved Palm Tree and my knitting machine.

definition deliberate [verb] "to engage in long and careful consideration" 

definition deliberate [adj] "done consciously and intentionally

Much as I love Cornerstones, and life in Norfolk, in many ways laying down 40 years in ministry wasn't done lightly. I found the leaving UCF easier because we did it deliberately. Bob spent a really long time considering his different roles, and working out how to leave the church in a 'prepared' state. Nobody in a church/school/workplace/family wants to find themselves asking "How do we do this?" and find the answer is "We don't know, X always did it" or "That was Y's job, and we've got no idea where the key/contact number/password is"

None of our furniture ended up in a skip. The dining suite went to Manchester. We considered what we could sell, and the 'better' pieces went off to Facebook Marketplace. And then two young friends were allocated Married Quarters at the barracks- and really grateful for a bed, sofas, coffee table, bookcases etc [it was dead weird going to visit, and sit in their lounge surrounded by our stuff though!] I am so glad to be able to picture my stuff in their family home now. 

After a couple of months in Norfolk, I deliberately left some social media groups I was in. I explained that we had settled happily, miles from Dorset and it just wasn't appropriate for me to be part of the group anymore. People were kind, wishing us well - and many have sent the occasional private message since. 

My Palm Tree went to a Primary School, along with a set of Nativity Costumes.  And my knitting machine, unused since Kirby days, went to someone who wanted to take up the craft in her retirement. Leaving these once much-used, special items with people who would love and care for them and give them new purpose felt really positive.

I acknowledge that I have been blessed with the time to prepare for this huge change, many people have to get up and flee and leave everything. But these news pictures remind me I have too much stuff - I need to be passing it on to others. My newly widowed neighbour told me yesterday that her late husband's winter coats have all gone to Ukraine Relief on a lorry - I said he was a good, kind man who would be glad that they were blessing others, and not hanging unused in a wardrobe. She said that thought was helping her.

Minimalism is definitely a Work In Progress for me. I can't look at an item and make the keep/discard decision quickly. I want to be sure I am not ditching something which still has a purpose for somebody else- nor yet hanging on to things which hinder my progress. This is a spiritual issue as well as a practical and emotional one. As the Bible says in Hebrews ch 12

So then, let us rid ourselves of everything that gets in the way, and of the sin which holds on to us so tightly, and let us run with determination the race that lies before us. Let us keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, on whom our faith depends 

Not Just Any Old Bag

 A totally unexpected piece of post last week, from the Norfolk Museums Service. We purchased an annual pass a few months back. A "Joint Seniors" - cost us £63 and we have already had more than our money back in terms of admissions. But they have sent all Pass holders a tote bag as a 'small token of appreciation' for support and patience whilst work is be carried out at the Castle.

Designed by local illustrator Nigel Orme, the accompanying letter says the bag features "iconic images from the museum collections"

I've identified some of the images. Working clockwise from the Castle itself, I found 

• a fish with an ermine cape and crown [?] 
• a lady's mask [Norwich Castle] 
• a sea creature [I think that's Time&Tide Museum, Yarmouth] 
• centre left is a big cat [?]
• bottom right is the Snettisham Hoard Anglo Saxon Great Torc, 
• bottom centre, Henry Blogg the Lifeboat Cox [Cromer Museum] 
• The teapot, lady's shoe and the Egyptian Sarcophagus are all from Norwich Castle. 
• I cannot identify the cross design
• the horse may be from the Gressenhall workhouse and farm
• the lock and key may be from the Kings Lynn Museum.

There is no explanation of the icons or their locations in the letter, nor on the NM website so I emailed Nigel to ask for one. He replied the same evening and said he's going to get the NM to send me all the information [what a thoughtful man]. Such a lovely gift, useful and thought provoking. Thank you Norfolk Museums [and Nigel] 

I'm really hoping that I will get to the Textiles Treasures Exhibition in the New Year [I'd hoped to go in November, but it didn't prove possible] The NMS has so much to enjoy, and I think the annual pass is definitely worth having- I've got a passion for history, and now I have time to visit, and discover more about the county where I live.

But Is It Art?

Today I shall be at an online conference all day - for Thrive, the support group for those of us married to Baptist Ministers. It includes spouses of students, chaplains, retired pastors, missionaries...and those who are widowed too. It happens in alternate years, and I missed the 2019 Conference because of Bob's TIA. So I am really looking forward to this one, and reconnecting with friends- even if it is on Zoom.

There are optional workshops, and I have chosen an art based one. My paints etc are all ready. I have no idea what will happen - I am a crafter rather than an artist...we will see.

When I was at the Tate with Liz the other week, I took a picture of this - it is an installation by Peter Fischli and David Weiss, part of "Untitled" - which is "A witty recreation of everyday objects in polyurethane sculpture"

And there was me thinking it was two old tyres on a stack of pallets with some scrap wood beside it. I don't get modern art.

The Very Nice Men who put up Bob's Lathe Palace had some wood left over, which they said they'd leave behind if he could use it. [yes please!] Bob reconfigured his temporary woodstore, and wrapped it in tarps and empty builders' bags, as rain was forecast. I thought this could definitely be considered a work of art. It reminded me of the Dancing Dragons from Chinese New Year, so I added a few features.

I spent Thursday, a sunny day, working on the front path. 

My other art installation is called "I need to make my Christmas cake" - a witty reminder that all the time I was mixing cement and sand, I kept thinking of flour and brown sugar and I want to get some festive baking underway soon.  

The past fortnight has been surprisingly busy - I'm grateful to the Thrive Committee for organising our Conference, it will be a good opportunity to reflect, and take stock of things - next week we will have been retired six months! It's been a wonderful time [mostly] 

and the adventure certainly continues...

Senior Moments

The answer to one of my crossword clues this week was throve - that is, the past participle of thrive [ie to prosper or flourish] When I mentioned the word to Bob, he suggested that maybe members of Thrive who are retired should be in a subset called Throve. 

Thrive is the wonderful support group for spouses of Baptists involved in ministry and mission. I mentioned this to the group - and one member immediately responded 'but we want you to go on thriving, even in retirement, Angela' Which was a very kind reply, I thought. I hope to thrive in retirement!

But I am having a few 'senior moments'. I was concerned that I'd not received any pension payments. The gov.uk website didn't help, and telephoning involved being put on perpetual hold [without IKEA's happy Abba music - just an irritating little repetitive jingle] I needed to change my address with them - which was useful. During the pandemic, telephone calls are only acceptable for change of address, bereavement or something about UK pensioners living in the EU and Switzerland. So on Wednesday I rang, and carried the phone round with me for 30 minutes whilst I did household tasks [it was a free call] - I was pegging the washing when the jingle stopped and a cheery Welsh voice said I was through to the pension site, and speaking to Paul. 

He asked a few security questions- including my house number back in Kirby Muxloe. I had a complete mental block. Was it 9? I had to go and ask Bob [it was 11]. Paul was very patient and said I was clearly me, as I knew all my postcodes etc even if I'd forgotten my house number from 6 years ago. Then he changed my address on the database. He checked my records. Yes, 8th January 2021, my claim for a pension had gone through as my letter stated. It was all done online and automated...but when my first payment was due, the computer flagged up an error in my bank details. I'd mis-typed my sort code, so they couldn't make a payment. An email had been sent last week [not received] and also a proper letter "But of course, that has gone to Dorset, Mrs Almond" We agreed it would probably arrive eventually, via the redirection service! Anyway Paul has sorted everything out, corrected my error, and my pension will arrive in the correct bank account soon. I said I felt a bit daft - and said it was an easy mistake- and the problem was that everything else was fine, and for 4 months, they, and I, thought it was all sorted, it just stumbled at the last fence. He's too polite - it was definitely a dotty granny mistake

Here is my favourite OAP joke. Three old ladies are sitting on a bench. One says "Isn't it windy?" The next says "No, it's Thursday" and the third says "So am I, let's have a cup of tea!"

I am definitely the third one in the group...

I Am Still Here

It has taken the best part of a month to change my profile on Blogger. Yes, I am now retired and living in Norfolk.

But I am having email issues.  Some of you good people have sent me messages and they have bounced back saying "Undeliverable - Inbox full"

Do not worry - they are getting through to me. However although I can read them, I am unable to reply from my regular address - so my replies will come from somewhere else. Apologies for all the confusion this has caused. Sometimes technology is not our friend.

I'm A Twirly!

It's official - my OAP Concessionary Bus Pass has arrived.[which is more than you can say for my OAP payment] And I'm officially a "Twirly" [for non-UK readers- bus passes in England work from 9.30am - if you try to use them before that, they say you're "Too Early"]

At least the photo is better than the one on my Driving Licence and Passport. Bob does not get his pass till November. I can get into Dereham [eg for the Bank] quite quickly- the bus runs every hour, and takes about 15 minutes. 

It takes an hour and a half to get into Norwich bus station [that's three times as long as going in the car - is it worth it?]  On the other hand, I can also use the pass for buses in both London and Manchester, which may prove useful on future family visits.

Bob has just renewed his car insurance- and found that the best policy came via Saga["Now I am feeling old too!"] 

I'm approaching all this retirement stuff with a Positive Mental Attitude- after all, my word of the year is adventure 

These Boots Are Made for...Gardening

I have never considered myself to be any good at gardening. Relations gave us a spade and fork as wedding gifts "But we have no garden, we live in a flat" I said- and was assured that one day I would need them. Over the years I have attempted to grow things - but with very little success. But in the past couple of years, two things have encouraged me to try again - firstly the triumph of the orchids [oh I do hope I can keep them going without Jenny my orchid-tutor on hand to advise] and the arrival of the compost bin.

Back in February I made a brief trip up to Cornerstones, to provide Grandparental Support. It was that week when it was very windy and snowy. When I looked out into the garden, I noticed a compost bin. I put on my wellies and went out to check - it was clearly brand new. I rang my brother. "You said you'd left our Christmas presents here - I found the giftwrapped parcels- but did you leave us a compost bin too?" He denied all knowledge - and agreed it would be an unlikely gift.

Perhaps it had blown over the fence? I checked with all the neighbours- nobody had lost one. The council had been selling them for £10  - perhaps this one was delivered to the wrong house? But nobody has come to claim it- so I have started filling it up.

At Cornerstones, we have lots of grass- but very little by way of flowerbeds. The fig and bay trees are in their pots, and there's a honeysuckle growing over the fence which hides the oil tank. Along the front of the property is a narrow bed, where I planted lavender, rosemary and sage. These were fairly easy going and coped with our prolonged absences. To the side we planted an apple and a pear tree- and now an almond tree.

I can tell you now, the spade and fork have had more use in the past week than in the previous forty years. I'm determined to get the hang of gardening. In the past there have always been lessons to prepare, youth activities to organise, committee meetings to attend. But I am retired now...

A hundred years ago the artist William Nicholson went to paint Gertrude Jekyll the garden designer. She was too busy to sit for her. So he painted her gardening boots. I saw this picture in the Tate years ago, and was fascinated by it. I have been doing my gardening in a pair of 'desert boots' which originally belonged to Steph [I think] and they must be nearly twenty years old now! I am not posting any pictures of my gardening progress yet, but here are the boots [hers and mine]