Saturday, 17 May 2008

They don't write 'em like they used to

I have just emptied the bath - one large carrier bag of probably unusable bottle tops - and 904 [yes, I counted!] useful ones. Initially began humming Cole Porter lyrics...

You're the top! You're the Coliseum.
You're the top! You're the Louvre Museum. anythinggoes
You're a melody from a symphony by Strauss
You're a Bendel bonnet, A Shakespeare's sonnet,
You're Mickey Mouse.

You're the Nile, You're the Tower of Pisa,
You're the smile on the Mona Lisa
I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop,
But if, baby, I'm the bottom you're the top!
You're the top! You're Mahatma Gandhi.
You're the top! You're Napoleon Brandy.
You're the purple light of a summer night in Spain,
You're the National Gallery, You're Garbo's salary,
You're cellophane.

You're sublime, You're a turkey dinner,
You're the time, of a Derby winner
I'm a toy balloon that’s fated soon to pop
But if, baby, I'm the bottom, You're the top!

This has to be the ultimate "List Song" - and it's fascinating to see what was considered 'tops' in the 1930's. The song was written for the musical ['Anything Goes' in 1934.] Then, moving on, twenty years, I started singing stuff from "Gentlemen prefer Blondes" [1953]because that was on TV this afternoon. Marilyn Monroe is streets better than Jane Russell, in my opinion.monroe

A kiss on the hand may be quite continental
But diamonds are a girl's best friend
A kiss may be grand but it won't pay the rental
On your humble flat, or help you at the automat
Men grow cold as girls grow old
And we all lose our charms in the end
But square-cut or pear-shaped
These rocks don't lose their shape
Diamonds are a girl's best friend

Time rolls on and youth is gone
And you can't straighten up when you bend
But stiff back or stiff knees
You stand straight at Tiffany's
Diamonds... Diamonds...- I don't mean rhinestones -
But Diamonds, Ahepburnre A Girl's Best Friends

Kneeling beside the bath, counting out nearly a thousand bottle tops is enough to give anyone stiff back and stiff knees! Will someone please take me to Tiffany's? For Breakfast, perhaps [but that was 1961, with Audrey Hepburn]

Questions still unanswered - what is a Bendel Bonnet, and who was Audrey's Huckleberry friend?

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