KonMari Contrary

OK, I did try – I reserved Marie Kondo’s bestseller “The Life Changing Magic Of Tidying” from the Dorset libraries. I was 16^th in the queue – and by the time it arrived for me in the Ferndown branch, I had rather lost enthusiasm. I freely acknowledge for many people that this book has been a revelation – but it doesn’t work for me at all. The writing style irritated me- but perhaps that may be bad translation from the Japanese.

For starters, MK’s method [called KonMari after her childhood nickname] is not so much about tidying as discarding. She suggests you eliminate anything from your home that does not bring you joy. You must actually put your hand on each thing [dress, book, ornament, whatever] and if you don’t feel the joy, then out it goes. No argument. “What about the cat litter tray?” said Liz – “I won’t be filled with joy if I put my hand in it, but it is essential in my flat!” MK says there must be genuine joy, not sentimental attachment to things from the past, you must live in the present. Bob says this is why I can’t do it. I pick up a book, and read the inscription in the front – and thank the Lord for the Girls’ Brigade Captain who gave it, and for all she taught me. I look at the little badge in my jewellery box, bearing the photo of a lad killed on his motorbike – and I remember to pray for his Mum back in Kirby Muxloe. My hot water bottle is in an old red cover, it was my Mum’s, and cuddling it reminds me of her. So many of my things carry memories – but happy ones, which inspire me to go on, to do more, to pray more, to love more…

MK won’t let you stockpile either, and cites people who store 20,000 cotton buds. “Only buy things as you need them” She’d be horrified at the idea of my Great Stash in the loft – which is constantly changing – fabric and yarn used up, and more mysteriously arrives as needed [like the widow’s oil in the OT] and my pantry, with bottled plums and jars of marmalade – prepared and stored in season. They all get used, or given away…eventually.  William Morris’ mantra about keeping only what you know to be useful or believe to be beautiful works better for me. And as for only having a minimal number of plates [you can always buy disposables if you have guests round, she says] I accept there are just 2 of us most of the time – but in the short time we have been here, we have hosted two events, one with 60+ guests, the other with 20+ [and we haven’t even got to the BBQ or Christmas season] To buy and discard would be both expensive and not eco-friendly. She also tells you to throw away almost all paper- including payslips – she’s obviously not a teacher in the UK, then. If I had not kept my payslips, I would have lost a significant amount of my pension

And as for ' don't keep spare bedlinen for visitors - just rent a set of sheets when you need them' What!??!! There really doesn’t seem to be that much about tidying, more about ways to organise and store. Keep everything that is alike in the same place. Must I go upstairs whenever I need scissors, or have all the radios in the bedroom? And her vague instruction about ‘all electrical things should be in a box together’- makes no sense at all [razor, food mixer, sewing machine…??]

Everything needs to be folded, a key Japanese principle [they invented origami] I fold teeshirts - but socks and tights? She says "Socks bust their chops for you, if you ball them up they don't get a chance to rest. The socks in your drawer are essentially on holiday"

Our socks are rolled tidily in the approved Van Der Zanden rectangles,  I haven't heard complaints. 

Her technique for hanging clothes is “Hang up anything that looks happier hung up, and arrange like with like, matching colours, working from left to right, with dark, heavy clothing on the left: Clothes, like people, can relax more freely when in the company of others who are very similar in type, and therefore organizing them by category helps them feel more comfortable and secure.”

And she allows a few books- but suggests they be kept on a shelf in a cupboard. But books do furnish a room! I cannot get on with her habit of anthropomorphism, thanking the kettle for boiling, and being grateful to my sewing machine. [MK claims such gratitude makes these items work harder to give you joy!]  I thank the LORD, often, for all His blessings- and I thank individuals too [I frequently tell Bob how grateful I am that he bought me my machine, or tell the girls how much joy the bicycle brings me] I make-do-and-mend, I recycle and re-use stuff, I save things, I redeem them, It might work in Japan, but sorry Ms Kondo, your scheme doesn’t work for me at all. I wait to see how long it is before her books start appearing in the CS.   Rant over!!

[PS apologies that blogposts are looking strange. Live Writer has stopped working properly]