Saturday, 13 February 2021

Animal Crackers

In these sad and strange times, it's sometimes a good idea to look past the main headlines to the crazier stories at the end of the bulletins. I'm still smiling at Bernie Sanders mittens. Here's three tales this week with a vague animal connection...

Gorillas. More precisely, gorilla spray adhesive. This company makes amazingly strong glues. They have careful instructions and warnings on the packaging. So what possessed a woman in Louisiana to use this spray adhesive on her head, l have no idea. She is obviously in real discomfort now, and I'm sorry about that 
- but what was she thinking? 

It seems you can buy "Gorilla" hair products in the USA, but from a completely different company. She's facing huge medical bills, but people seem to be crowdfunding for her. At first she was considering litigation against Gorilla - I think that would have been an even more expensive mistake. She might have chosen the wrong lawyer...Animal Story #2
Kittens. A lawyer in Texas appeared as a kitten in a court case being conducted via Zoom. The judge pointed out there was a filter on his screen. Roy Ponton assured the judge he was present and he was not a cat. However, he didn't know how to remove the filter. 
I can allow him not knowing how to get rid of Pussycat face. I use Zoom, but wouldn't be able to remove the whiskers either. But what really bothered me was his statement about the mischief must have been done "by the last person to use my secretary's computer". This is a lawyer. Surely he understands the need for cyber security? His secretary would have important legal documents on her computer, sensitive and confidential... Is it really possible for some prankster in the office to use her machine, and make a fool of the boss? 
One gets the impression that there are many people in the USA making megabucks in the legal profession. I doubt Mr Ponton is going to be one of them. So he won't need Animal Story #3
Frogs and dozens of dozens of other cuddly little animals - flamingo, panda, lobster, mouse, monkey...knitted, stitched, crocheted... Then sewn onto a plain black man's sweater. 
With an eye-watering price tag of £8,500!

Fashion house Louis Vuitton have revealed this garment on the catwalk as the thing for the well dressed chap this season. It looks to me like a bleary eyed dad fell asleep in his toddler's bedroom, and woke up to find the contents of the toy cupboard pinned to his jumper. 
Leave the clothes LV, just stick to making classy luggage. 




8 comments:

  1. I guess you wont be making a similar jumper for Bob?

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  2. That jumper is ridiculous! The cat lawyer story made me laugh! I agree though with the point you made.
    The Gorilla woman really is dumb! You READ the instructions! Gorillas remind me of Nicola Sturgeon....

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  3. That pullover is absolutely ridiculous. And I can't imagine many guys wanting to wear it, at any price!

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  4. I watched the cat lawyer video and it did make me laugh! As for the other two - SERIOUSLY???? You wonder where all common sense has gone some days!

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  5. The Gorilla glue issue has blown up to a silly level now especially on Twitter. Race has been dragged into it as you'd half expect. I bet the poor woman wishes she'd never posted it on TikTok now x

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    1. Posting it online was her second big mistake I think. I've just read that she's cut off her long ponytail now, to stop the weight of the hair pulling on the roots.

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  6. I think I've found a use for all those stuffed animals/'beanie babies' my daughter used to collect! :D

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    Replies
    1. Maybe you could create a jumper like this and sell it on Etsy!

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